Relationships are Connections of the Heart Supported by Reason (Gems from Shaykh Faraz Rabbani)

As a collaboration between the SeekersHub Toronto, the Muslim Chaplaincy at U of T and the U of T MSA, the Muslim Chaplaincy at U of T offered a course during the Fall of 2014 called Living Light with Shaykh Faraz Rabbani. The sessions I attended were excellent, and left us with much to think about afterwards. Below, notes from one of the sessions. 

• Have a daily point of connection to the Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him
• The sunna is not just general principles, but practical specifics
• The Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him would keep in touch with people for decades afterwards
• Part of goodness to parents is goodness to the friends of one’s parents. To be respectful to their friends.
• Have loyalty in relationships
• We often like to study intellectual things but most important knowledge is that that transforms how we worship and how we are with Allah’s creation. We must constantly ask: what is the right action entailed by the right intention and attitude?
• Sometimes to determine this we need to momentarily disengage. When Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him asked the Companions to come out of ihram and they didn’t respond, there is a methodology we can learn in his response.
• a) Disengage (went inside his tent)
• b) Consult when unclear. Sometimes expressing your problem helps to view it correctly  (Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him consulted his wife)
• c) Only respond when sure. Don’t say or do anything hastily. Say the good or be silent.
• Good character is manifest when tested
• With couples/any relationship – tell yourself, i don’t want to respond to how I feel and what he/she saying, I want to respond in way pleasing to Allah
• Attitude and then action. Look at your spouse with mercy and love.
• Opposite of love is not hatred, it’s indifference. If motive is to look with mercy, you are seeking the good.
• Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, did not deal with people on the basis of what they said or did, dealt with people on the basis of heart. What is their underlying concerns.
• Have an eye of love and mercy. Have a good opinion of your spouse.
• Relations are a matter of the heart (emotions), they aren’t rational.
• Relationships are connections of the heart, supported by reason.
• Deal with people on the basis of good chraracter.
• The Prophet peace and blessings be upon him, gave us numerous examples – need to renew our connection to him, peace and blessings be upon him.

Your Perceptions Define Your Experiences (Gems from Soul Food with Ustadh Amjad Tarsin)

The Muslim Chaplaincy at U of T runs an amazing weekly discussion circle called Soul Food.  Below are notes from one of the sessions this term. Alhamdullilah for spaces to grow and learn with others!

• A true sense of hope is hoping for God’s mercy and working for it.
• When you see a sunset, why do you enjoy it? When you’re with family, what is your response? The response should be thankfulness
• Take advantage of every moment as an advantage of drawing close to God. We are sowing seeds for the akhira (afterlife)
• What is your purpose? Tip: Spend 5 minutes at the end of the day and sit and reflect. Engage in dhikr and quiet. 
• Death is around the corner. Allah and eternal bliss is what we should strive for. Death gives you immediacy. Contemplating death allows you to ask the question, where am I going? I’m going somewhere based on what I do here. How do I achieve the goals I have in the best way possible?
• Don’t be attached to results, be attached to God.
• Companions weren’t morbid, they were content with death. Natural to have a fear of the unknown but if have yaqeen, better able to handle things.
• Is what I’m doing, what I’m intending, something I will be glad that I did?
• Seek greater goals. Then everything you do becomes an act of worship.
• A righteous person, funeral is like a wedding. Your perceptions define your experiences.
• Really important to reflect on life. Where are you going? What are we attached to? What are our lives about? People who have a strong sense of this strive to do the most amount of good. Their hearts are full of the things that really matter.
• As attachments to the world decrease, arguments, grudges, backbiting decrease.
• We shouldn’t be small minded people, we should look at the big picture.
• We tend to have shallow communications. We hang out with people, but don’t have deep communications. 
• Chicken soup to a neighbour, the greatest act to change the world. Mutual acts of caring performed often forge a sense of belonging. Try to reignite the role of neighbours.

 

Make Gratitude Your Banner (and other Jum’ah Reminders by Ustadh Amjad Tarsin)

Alhamdullilah for Jum’ah! Whenever I’m able to attend, it’s lovely to benefit from the lessons of teachers, and to fuel up with their reminders for the week ahead. Below are a few reminders I took away from today’s Khutbah by Ustadh Amjad Tarsin at the University of Toronto. Duas that your Ramadan is going well! All mistakes in recall are my own.

1) This is a month of connection and reconnection. Reconnecting with God, reconnecting with family, reconnecting with community. Do not be of those who break family ties. And invite people. There are people in our community who may be international students far from home, or converts fasting on their own, or people who cannot afford iftar. Invite them over and feed them, and benefit from the tremendous reward.

2) Gratitude leads to increase. Make gratitude your banner.

3) The scholars say that Ramadan is a school. Take time to assess yourself honestly and ask yourself, what grade would I give myself? If you haven’t felt the sweetness of Ramadan yet, it’s not too late.

4) Security and safety are blessings. And it’s a blessing we cannot take for granted. We may all know people who do not enjoy this blessing, or are suffering from hardship or illness. But duas work. Take time every night, whether it’s one minute, or 5 minutes, or whatever you can do, to remember those who are suffering in other parts of the world.

5)  The last ten nights are coming, and in them a night is hidden that is better than 80 years of worship. Better than a thousand months. The Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, was more active in these days than he was the rest of the month.

Living Within My Means: Contentment Without Consumerism (Gems from Shaykh Ahmed Saad al-Azhari at ISNA Canada)

On Saturday, the 2nd day of the ISNA Canada Convention, Shaykh Ahmed Saad al-Azhari gave a lecture that was the highlight of the convention for me. The lecture was about contentment, and was a reminder that in this abode, we should strive to have good character and behaviour towards everyone out of our love for God and not because we expect recognition from others. It was also a reminder to be grateful for gifts and blessings for the duration we are gifted them instead of resentful or sad when we no longer have them. Throughout our lives, our hearts and hopes should be attached to God and to His Beloved, peace and blessings be upon him. 

Finally, Shaykh Ahmed Saad reminded us to not have overly specific expectations, and to allow ourselves to surrender to God’s Plan. The qadr of Allah is inescapable, and the path to contentment is to understand that as much as we try to bring about the things we want, we need to understand that our lives operate within the walls of Allah’s qadr. The lecture made me think of times when I’ve felt stressed out (when I was new to Toronto as a graduate student for instance), and assumed that everything would be easy, and unfold in a specific way, and how I became a more serene, tranquil person when I accepted the presence of challenges and had high expectations of God, but wasn’t overly prescriptive of what life should look like.  This lecture was a reminder of that same point, and so much more. Notes below.

The Divine Wisdom of Green and Environmental Stewardship (Gems from Ustadh Amjad Tarsin at ISNA Canada)

 On the 2nd day of the ISNA Canada Convention, we were blessed with a wonderful lecture by Ustadh Amjad Tarsin that was a reminder to be people of gentleness who are embodiments of mercy on earth, and who understand that honouring the connection between ourselves and the rest of creation is an integral part of our faith, not simply a  ‘good thing to do.” Ustadh Amjad reminded us that our faith is one of mercy, and when we learn something that contradicts mercy, we need to re-evaluate our understanding of what we’re learning. He also told us beautiful stories of the Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, and brought joy to our hearts by sharing how all of creation loves the Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him. This is more than just “community service” he told us, “All of creation deserves our respect and reverence because everything worships and praises its Lord.”

Finally, Ustadh Amjad ended his talk by giving us practical ways to become stewards of the earth, and his reminder to eat halal, good, wholesome, pure food is the one that resonated most with me. Ustadh Amjad’s lecture gave us practical ways to do this in our daily life. Notes from the lecture are below.

On Social Media and Happy Marriages (Day 1 at the ISNA Canada Convention)

This past weekend ISNA Canada held their annual convention at the ISNA Canada Masjid in Mississauga. And despite my full intentions to get there on time, I got lost on the 1st Day of the Convention, and only reached the masjid near the end of Shaykh Ahmed Saad al-Azhari’s lecture on Surah Kahf. What I heard was excellent though, and a good reminder to critically evaluate one’s time and energy in virtual spaces, to strive to have consistent behaviour regardless of who you are interacting with, and to have patience with the learning process.

After Shaykh Ahmed Saad spoke, Dr. Altaf Hussain gave a lecture on creating happy marriages and living “happily ever after.” He spoke about the importance of resisting the urge to have an elaborate wedding, and to focus instead on how a couple will live their life together afterwards. Once married he said, we need to focus on stopping “micro-aggressions” before they create major problems in our relationships, and build partnerships where dua and praying together and for each other are at the core of one’s shared life. Finally, he also addressed and you could hear the seriousness, emphasis and frustration in his voice as he spoke, about the importance of remembering that the Prophet peace and blessings be upon him and Khadijah, may Allah be well pleased with her, had an age difference between them. As communities and families he said, we must stop assuming that women past a certain age/are older are unacceptable spouses. I stayed for that lecture as well before heading back downtown.

I was a bit shaken from getting lost and so my notes from the 1st day are very basic, but I’ve included them below. I’m not normally a conference -goer, but was really impressed by the quality of the ISNA Canada Convention. The volunteers were polite, there were so many families and young people in attendance, the bazaar was lovely, the masjid was beautiful, and throughout the whole event, you could tell that several months of planning and careful thought had gone into this weekend. Every lecture in the main hall had a sign language interpreter on stage to make the event more accessible, and the entire conference had a strong sustainability focus. Every registrant was given a refillable water bottle and there were no plastic water bottles sold at the conference alhamdullilah. May God bless and reward in the best of ways all those involved in this conference, and enable us to implement what we learned insha’Allah. It truly was a beneficial, needed weekend.

Accessible gatherings

Prophetic Love is a Love that Heals (Visiting the SeekersHub)

On Thursday last week my heart was feeling heavy, and so following my mother’s excellent advice that remembrance of the Prophet peace and blessings be upon him eases the heart, I went to the SeekersHub Toronto to hear Shaykh Ahmed Saad al-Azhari speak and to participate in the weekly mawlid.

Though I’ve been in Toronto for the past couple of months, this was my first visit to the new Hub location, and I’m so, so happy I made the trip finally. (God bless and reward the kind soul that helped make the journey easier by picking me up).  If you haven’t visited the SeekersHub Toronto yet either, I highly recommend the trip. To start with, the space is beautiful.  One wall features a large calligraphy piece by Toronto calligrapher Sehar Shahzad, and seeing this piece in person is worth the trip alone. Her work radiates love, and its wonderful to see local institutions supporting local artists. 

But the Hub is so much more than a beautiful physical space. It almost felt like Eid that night- there were families and people of all ages in the Hub, and everyone was smiling, happy, and truly glad to be there celebrating the beauty of the Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him. It was wonderful to see so many familiar faces and so many unknown ones, and to see how much the Hub has grown since I last lived in Toronto alhamdullilah. 

And even though it had been a while since I’ve participated in a mawlid, it was a very accessible gathering. The evening started with a beautiful recitation of the Dua Nasiri, a powerful dua that applies to our world and to our everyday, individual lives. One line in particular that I found moving was the following:

“You are the One on Whom We call to remove our adversities,
and You are the One we hope will dispel our sorrows.”

To you, our Lord, we have stretched out our hands
and from You, our Lord, we hope for kindness.

Be kind to us in what You decree
and let us be pleased with what pleases You.

 

Since the Mawlid I’ve been listening to this dua constantly, and I highly recommend hearing this recitation of this moving, important dua.  After the Dua Nasiri we recited a beautiful dua for rain, and again, hearing the dua and reading its meaning about physical and spiritual rain was a heart-softening experience.

Supplication for Rain

 

Later on in the mawlid, Shaykh Ibrahim Hussain shared a beautiful Urdu naat with us, and though hearing about the Prophet in any language softens the heart and is beautiful, hearing poetry in a language where I can appreciate the subtlety of the poetry without the intermediary of translation was my favourite part of the gathering.  Sidi Nader Khan also shared an Urdu naat with us that was exceptional, and such moments are the ones have the most impact on my heart. Alhamdullilah for the diversity of forms of praise about the Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him!

The mawlid closed before Maghrib with Sidi Nader treating us to an bluesy-jazz number in English that was extraordinary, and something we could all participate in through the chorus of “laa ilaha illAllah”. By this point in the gathering, I felt so much joy and happiness, and felt markedly different from when I walked into the door. Alhamdullilah for this deen and the light of faith, alhamdullilah for the beauty and mercy of the Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, and alhamdullilah for the beauty and company of fellow believers! Truly, reflecting on the gifts we’ve been given make external challenges so much easier to deal with, and the Hub facilitates such remembrance.

After Maghrib Shaykh Ahmed Saad al-Azhari gave a powerful reminder (I highly recommend listening to it in its entirety!) about how the Qur’an should change our lives (notes below) and people stayed after the lesson for Isha, to drink delicious Moroccan tea (everything about the Hub is sweet) and to catch up and meet new friends and old. All in all, it was a night of tranquility, and I look forward to my next visit insha’Allah! 

Building a Spiritual Connection With the Qur’an – Gems from Shaykh Ahmed Saad al-Azhari

Yesterday I attended Shaykh Ahmed Saad al-Azhari’s lecture on “Building a Spiritual Connection to the Qur’an” at the University of Toronto – Mississauga , and I am so grateful to the Muslim Chaplaincy, the SeekersHub and the MSA for making this lecture possible.  It’s been a difficult week, and I came to the class in need of spiritual rain and respite and relief from my own thoughts.

Alhamdullilah, I’m so glad I made the journey! Shaykh Ahmed gave us excellent, practical advice on how to develop a connection to the Qur’an, and his joyful, gentle state, and palpable love for the Book of Allah gave us the encouragement we needed to strive to implement his advice.  The class was a reminder that the Qur’an is the medicine our hearts sorely need, and that developing a relationship with the Qur’an is what will heal our hearts. Happiness and contentment is only through proximity to Allah, His Book, and following the way of His Beloved, peace and blessings be upon him.

My notes from last night are not extensive as I listened more than took notes, but you can hear the lecture in its entirety here through the Muslim Chaplaincy Soundcloud page. (I highly recommend listening to the lecture in its entirety – the stories Shaykh Ahmed told us during the class were so so beautiful!)  If you’re in the Toronto area though, do make sure to check out Shaykh’s Ahmed’s remaining lectures while he is still in town. He speaks tonight (the 15th) at the SeekersHub, and this weekend at the ISNA Canada Convention. Such gatherings of goodness soften the heart and should not be missed.

Notes:

The Miracle of the Qur’an

• The Qur’an is the biggest ni’ma (blessing)  that Allah has given us. Every Prophet, peace be upon them all, was given a miracle that was enough for people to follow him. Musa peace be upon him, had a stick that turned into a snake. And our Prophet peace and blessings be upon him, told us that what he was given was not a physical miracle, it was the Qur’an. The Qur’an is not time-bound. It proves the message by the content of the message.

• The Quran is an accessible book. Every book is structured with an audience in mind. A primary school book is not written the same as an academic book. The Qur’an is a book that addresses everyone.

• The Quran has always been at the centre of the ummah.

• Allah tells us, “We have made the Qur’an easy for remembering. Is there anyone who wishes to remember?

• The scholars are particular about every sound of the Qur’an and how it is pronounced. They wouldn’t be particular in the same way about spoken Arabic, but this isn’t just spoken Arabic, it is Qur’anic Arabic. It’s not dialectical variation. The scholars even discuss the validity of the prayer for someone who makes a mistake in recitation.

Stories of people who had a spiritual connection to the Qur’an

• There was a Companion who was on night duty in Madinah, and was reciting the Qur’an in his prayer, and as he was praying, he heard some noises, and saw some lights. In the morning, he asked the Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him about what he saw. And the Prophet peace and blessings be upon him said that those were angels who came down to hear his recitation, and if he had continued till morning, people would have seen the angels on earth.

• I have always wondered: what was different about his recitation that it brought angels to earth, and our recitation doesn’t hit our hearts? That we don’t even have presence of heart in our recitation?

• Abdullah ibn Mas’ud – he was asked to recite to the Prophet peace and blessings be upon him and his recitation brought tears to the eyes of the Prophet.  What was unique about his recitation that it invoked the tears of the Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, the person who actually received the Qur’an? He was reciting the Qur’an to the person who received the Qur’an, the person who already knows everything that is in the Qu’ran. Was it just the sound of his voice?

• Very few of the Companions were asked by the Prophet to recite the Qur’an to him.

• There was another companion who had a beautiful voice, and the Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him would sit for hours outside his tent listening to his prayers. And one day he came out and saw the Prophet peace and blessings be upon him there, and he was surprised. He asked, “Oh Messenger, how long have you been sitting there?” And the Prophet peace and blessings be upon him said “You have a beautiful voice like Dawud alayhis salaam”.
• Why did the Prophet  peace and blessings be upon him mention Dawud alayhis salaam, when all the Prophets had beautiful voices? Allah has mentioned the voice of Dawud alayhis salaam in the Quran, and told us that when he recited, the whole universe was listening and chanting with him. The mountains and birds were chanting with him, the animals were accumulating to listen to him. Allah subjugated the mountains to him, and they would praise Allah.

• After 40 years of marriage, The father of Imam Jazari did not have kids. And then he went for Hajj, had a lot of ZamZam water and prayed for a child who would be a great scholar. 9 months later, Imam Jazari was born, and he was someone who was separated from his kids, stopped from doing Hajj, went through incredible persecution, and throughout it all, he was writing and teaching texts about the Qur’an. He had an unimaginable connection and devotion to the Qur’an. He even taught his kidnappers, so much saw that they delayed his release in order to get ijaza from him. And Imam Jazari is to the sciences of Qur’an the way Imam Bukhari is to hadith.

• The best of you is the one that learns and teaches the Qur’an. – Hadith.

• Why?  The Qur’an has always been central to the ummah. The Qur’an cuts khilaf (difference). When you have a Qur’an teacher, you care about their knowledge of recitation, not about other issues of difference.
• The Qur’an is the strong rope of Allah that binds us together.

Gems from Sidi Amjad Tarsin’s Khutbah “Where is the Love?”

Every time I listen to content from the Muslim Chaplaincy at the University of Toronto, my heart fills with joy, and I wonder why I don’t visit their SoundCloud page more often. Masha’Allah, the Chaplaincy content is relevant, practical and full of mercy, and I’m so glad it’s accessible to people like myself who live outside the Toronto area. (To sustain the Muslim Chaplaincy, you can learn more here) Below, my notes from their Feb 7th Khutba titled “Where is the Love.”

• Be mindful of Allah. Every blessing we have is a manifestation of His generosity. And every blessing we have, and every luxury we enjoy should be used in His service and gratitude.

• To proceed, one of the most important responsibilities we have as an ummah, as a community of believers is mutual love and concern for one another.

• As the Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him said:  “None of you truly believes until you love for brother and sister what you love for yourself”. That extends to a brother or sister in humanity, and the rights we owe brothers and sisters in faith is even greater. The sincere concern we should express for one another is even greater.

• Allah says in the Qu’ran: Indeed the believers, are brothers and sisters.” The bond of faith is greater than an intellectual agreement. It goes deeper than that. Our bond is rooted in the Real. We owe one another rights and we owe one another love. We owe it to love one another.

• Sometimes we hear this and think it applies to someone else. Very easy for nafs to say other people are falling short. But we need to talk about I can improve, how we can improve. When we improve, the benefit will spread by Allah’s Grace.

• Need to ask ourselves: How much love, how much sincere concern do I have for my brothers and sisters? And this is a duty. This is a duty we have to Allah and His Messenger and to one another, to have love for one another. We have to ask ourselves, how much love and concern am I showing?

• The Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him when he would sit with his companions, he would ask about people, he would notice when people were missing. When someone was sick, the Prophet peace and blessings be upon him would say, lets go visit them. It was a community that was built upon love and reverence of Allah, and it permeated and translated into the way that they treated one another. Which is why we are still benefiting from the fruits of their love and reverence 1400 years later in Canada. We have a responsibility to live that way, to care for one another and have that sincere love for one another.

• We have to have that sincere concern for everyone, for people we don’t agree with, for people who may be falling short. It’s easy to show love to people who show goodness to us, who agree with us.

• There was a companion that the Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him pointed out as a person who was granted Paradise. He didn’t perform extraordinary acts of worship, but when asked what he did for the Prophet peace and blessings be upon him to have pointed him out in this way, he responded saying, “I can’t think of anything special, but every night before bed I forgive everyone who has wronged me. “

Gems from Embodied Light, Class 2 with Sidi Amjad Tarsin (Part 1)

In the second session of the class Embodied Light with Sidi Amjad Tarsin from the Muslim Chaplaincy at the University of Toronto, the physical description of the Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him was discussed. (The subject of the first session was the Prophet as light and the names of the Prophet peace and blessings be upon him). Below, notes from the first half of the class. What I love about this class so far is that even listening from afar, learning about the Prophet creates a happiness in the heart. There was a moment in the class where the teacher described a story where the Prophet wore a red garment, and hearing that story really does make you long to see the beauty and light of the Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him. What a gift to have teachers who make you want to be a better person and be someone who is loved by the Beloved! To learn more about supporting this mubarak class and other excellent programming, please see here.

• What is love? How does love manifest itself, express itself in human interaction? Some ways:

1. Doing things that make the person you love happy.
2. Want to know everything about that person. You want to immerse yourself in that person.
3. Want to emulate that person.

• People around the Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, were lovers.

• The Prophet peace and blessings be upon him, was physically the most beautiful person, even more beautiful than the Prophet Yusuf, peace be upon him. No one before him or after him was given that appearance, peace and blessings be upon him. He was neither exceedingly tall or short. He was in between, but inclined to tallness. His hair was neither fine nor coarse. His skin was neither white to the point of paleness nor was he dark, peace and blessings be upon him.

•  One of the miracles of the Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, was that everything about him was moderate.

• When he brushed his hair it would part and also curl.

• Allah has told us in the Qur’an, “We have made you a middle nation”. If you look at Islam, one of the amazing things about it is that everything is in moderation. Extremes in the religion are to be avoided. If you look at Islam, you have rules and you have spirituality.

• The Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, had thick hands and feet. Prophet was manly, peace and blessings be upon him and was the most beautiful expression of manliness you can find.  One of the plights we have today is that men are not manly. The Prophet,peace and blessings be upon him, exuded strength.

• He had a large head, but not exceedingly large. He had big limbs and bones. He was sturdy, peace and blessings be upon him. He had light hair on his chest in a line to his navel, peace and blessings be upon him.

• When he walked, his whole body was involved in the process of walking. When you saw the Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, knew that he was not a lazy person, peace and blessings be upon him. The Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, never dragged his feet. The Prophet’s actions and habits have wisdom. There is always something to do. The Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, had determination in his life. He had things to do. And if you look at his life, in the span of 23 yeras, the Arabian Peninsula and the Quraysh went from being unknown to being world powers on a global scale. And of course the point of Islam isn’t to become a world power, but it goes to show how the Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, transformed people. He did this (with the attitude)  that I don’t have time to waste. Nowadays we have people playing videogames into their thirties, have people watching movies all day long, but we should say, I don’t have time for that. I’ve got to change the world. I’ve got to connect people with Allah. I’ve got stuff to do. That’s how the Prophet was, peace and blessings be upon him. They say that when the Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, was walking and had something to do, just get out of the way. Nobody could stay in his way, sallallahu alayhi wasalaam.